Sooooo
after the random generation of the words trouble, chess and bear in
the 3 little words game. I found,watched and reviewed the
following film.
This
film can only be described in the words of Barney Stinson as
LEGEN...... Wait for it.........DARY.
It
is of course the classic comedy/horror lite/actioner known as....The
Bear who had Trouble with Chess.
What?
You haven't heard of it?? And you call yourselves film
fans! Anywhoo...it's a story of an under appreciated bear
called Peter who has no interest in doing bear things but has an
uncanny knack for winning chess games. He befriends a small man
child by the name of Jennings and together they travel all around the
country competing in chess tournaments chased by a nutty circus owner
who wants Peter to be his main attraction. All is well until
the big chess final when Peter, having withheld his dark secret from
his Christopher Robin is distraught, not being able to take the
deception anymore Peter confronts his pal Jennings and unzips ....(
his bear costume!!)'...to reveal.... AL.... Jennings EVIL
TWIN......Mhuwahahahaha!!!....WAIT......WAIT.....if you were reading
that and though "Damn!...that sounds good I'm going to need to
check that out"... Then puleeese step away from your DVD
player.. Open your front door and look around... See civilisation?
.... Good... Now go get a life you've been couped up far far too long
friend!!!.
Anyway
I really watched John Carpenter's "Big Trouble in Little
China" the Kurt Russell vehicle from 1986... Sheesh 26
years..how the time has flown by since I was a seven year old sitting
on the carpet eyes glued to the 19 inch colour TV with wood
panelling... Boy that TV was sweet!!.
Anyway
for the few people or young uns who may not have seen it, here is a
brief synopsis -
Hapless
trucker Jack Burton and his kung fu clan member friend Wang Chi try
to rescue wangs fiancé from the clutches of a 2000 year old magician
by the name of Lo Pan, who wants to take her as his wife bacause she
has emerald green eyes ( go figure). Much kung fu, sorcery,
fisticuffs and wisecracking ensue...Oh and a few monsters!!
Anyway,
my trip down nostalgia lane was bittersweet! Don't get me
wrong...the story is still engaging, it has a similar feel to other
80's classics such as The Goonies or Gremlins.
The
acting is great, well from Russell and James Wong as the evil
magician Lo Pan at least. The rest are the upper side of
average at best. For instance, Kim Cattrall, best know as
strong willed cougar Samantha in Sex and the City is relegated to
typical 80's eye candy in a thinly written part in which she plays a
lawyer who is intellectually superior than the hero...yet spends much
of the time (and using none of her smarts) needing rescued!!
Snake
Plisken and R.J. Mcready aside, Russell has rarely topped this
performance as idiot macho man Jack Burton, only his turn as
Gabriel in 1989's Tango and Cash has allowed him to flex both his
action and wise cracking muscles at the same time. Which is a
shame, cos he is superb at it (let's not mention Captain Ron...
Ever!!! That's the first rule of Kurt Club!)
Anyway,
as Russell's bumbling hero staggers from one set piece to another,
the action scenes are great and stand the test of time...mostly. The
only real let down is the special effects! I have better on my
mobile apps. These were amazing when I was seven, but then so
was my Atari! Not so amazing at 32!
This
film is so ready for a Lucas style revamp!! Time to bring it to
a new generation.
It
is typically 80's with its electric pop/ rock sound, naff
clothes/hair and set design and a typical 80's presentation,
but it's self knowing enough to not take itself too seriously. It's
just unadulterated FUN!!
You
could do worse than taking a ride back in time on the pork chop
express.... adventure might be bigger now but rarely does it get any
better..
Rose
tinted glasses... Maybe... But i'm a sucker for 80's movies...Big
Trouble in Little China kung fu's its way to the top of my
awesomeness chart.. Re-check it out!!
