Monday, 21 May 2012
Sooooo after the random generation of the words trouble, chess and bear in the 3 little words game. I found,watched and reviewed the following film.
This film can only be described in the words of Barney Stinson as LEGEN...... Wait for it.........DARY.
It is of course the classic comedy/horror lite/actioner known as....The Bear who had Trouble with Chess.
What? You haven't heard of it?? And you call yourselves film fans! Anywhoo...it's a story of an under appreciated bear called Peter who has no interest in doing bear things but has an uncanny knack for winning chess games. He befriends a small man child by the name of Jennings and together they travel all around the country competing in chess tournaments chased by a nutty circus owner who wants Peter to be his main attraction. All is well until the big chess final when Peter, having withheld his dark secret from his Christopher Robin is distraught, not being able to take the deception anymore Peter confronts his pal Jennings and unzips ....( his bear costume!!)'...to reveal.... AL.... Jennings EVIL TWIN......Mhuwahahahaha!!!....WAIT......WAIT.....if you were reading that and though "Damn!...that sounds good I'm going to need to check that out"... Then puleeese step away from your DVD player.. Open your front door and look around... See civilisation? .... Good... Now go get a life you've been couped up far far too long friend!!!.
Anyway I really watched John Carpenter's "Big Trouble in Little China" the Kurt Russell vehicle from 1986... Sheesh 26 years..how the time has flown by since I was a seven year old sitting on the carpet eyes glued to the 19 inch colour TV with wood panelling... Boy that TV was sweet!!.
Anyway for the few people or young uns who may not have seen it, here is a brief synopsis -
Hapless trucker Jack Burton and his kung fu clan member friend Wang Chi try to rescue wangs fiancé from the clutches of a 2000 year old magician by the name of Lo Pan, who wants to take her as his wife bacause she has emerald green eyes ( go figure). Much kung fu, sorcery, fisticuffs and wisecracking ensue...Oh and a few monsters!!
Anyway, my trip down nostalgia lane was bittersweet! Don't get me wrong...the story is still engaging, it has a similar feel to other 80's classics such as The Goonies or Gremlins.
The acting is great, well from Russell and James Wong as the evil magician Lo Pan at least. The rest are the upper side of average at best. For instance, Kim Cattrall, best know as strong willed cougar Samantha in Sex and the City is relegated to typical 80's eye candy in a thinly written part in which she plays a lawyer who is intellectually superior than the hero...yet spends much of the time (and using none of her smarts) needing rescued!!
Snake Plisken and R.J. Mcready aside, Russell has rarely topped this performance as idiot macho man Jack Burton, only his turn as Gabriel in 1989's Tango and Cash has allowed him to flex both his action and wise cracking muscles at the same time. Which is a shame, cos he is superb at it (let's not mention Captain Ron... Ever!!! That's the first rule of Kurt Club!)
Anyway, as Russell's bumbling hero staggers from one set piece to another, the action scenes are great and stand the test of time...mostly. The only real let down is the special effects! I have better on my mobile apps. These were amazing when I was seven, but then so was my Atari! Not so amazing at 32!
This film is so ready for a Lucas style revamp!! Time to bring it to a new generation.
It is typically 80's with its electric pop/ rock sound, naff clothes/hair and set design and a typical 80's presentation, but it's self knowing enough to not take itself too seriously. It's just unadulterated FUN!!
You could do worse than taking a ride back in time on the pork chop express.... adventure might be bigger now but rarely does it get any better..
Rose tinted glasses... Maybe... But i'm a sucker for 80's movies...Big Trouble in Little China kung fu's its way to the top of my awesomeness chart.. Re-check it out!!
Thursday, 17 May 2012
Okay, so out of all the guys I went to school with, very few and far between were as nerdy as myself. One particular nerd and film fanatic was Graeme Carr, who coincidentally happened to be our year "hottie" as well...who'd have thought the two would blend so perfectly together, bwahaha!?!! Anyhoo, all these years later, Graeme still remains one of my favourite geeks...so it is with great pleasure that I introduce him as my guest blogger on Musings of a Morleysaurus. :) He's a geek, he loves films and he's one sarcastic as fuck son of a bitch...what more could you ask for!?! ;) So without further adu...
Three little words....that's how it started....
But I'm getting ahead of myself..come on, hop on into my mind Delorian, kick back and head back with me to 7th of may 2009.
Now, I'm a film geek, I love them, I can happily watch film after film and a rarely turn even the worst of them off. And as such I have acquired over the years,a vast DVD collection. ...And this had become the root of my problem.
On this day in 2009 I found myself with a little time to spare...aha! Film time I thought to myself....I checked my love film DVDs....hmm....must have forgot to send these back... Balls!....so I checked Sky movies.... Absolute Hee haw!... That's ok let's raid the collection. So off I trudge to the cupboard...swing back the door.....and gazed at the tower after tower of loose DVDs....and there I stood...for 45 minutes...undecided...
Did I want to watch an action movie, a horror, maybe a thriller .. No, a drama.... No wait, there's one still unwrapped....oh crap I watched that the other nite on tv. By the time I had come to a conclusion...and emerged..triumphant from the cupboard like a house bound indiana jones clutching my prize aloft....I was out of time... I had won the war but lost the race.......dejected I got ready for work....and in that dark hour...I vowed....NEVER AGAIN.
And so it was born........(insert cheesy game show music) Three .Little. Words.
Simple game with three simple rules.
Pick 3 random words. ( I use a word generator online, but the old open a book,close your eyes, put your finger Down...that's word one!..repeat x 2 works just fine.)
Now I open the DVD cupboard and try and find a film that contains all 3 words. If not then try for 2... And finally 1... Now admittedly the smaller the collection the more difficult it becomes. But out of three words I can normally find at least one film!
Rule 3. .... The golden rule
You must watch that film...no deviation,no swapping, no last minute bonus words...YOU WATCH THE DAMN FILM.
If its shit you've only got yourself to blame!!... After all you probably bought it! But you'll find you watch some long forgotten gems and remember some long forgotten associated memories.
If you find yourself In a similar position...remember. Three. Little. Words.... I hope you play!
So after my next game, I will review the film. I hope you tune in.
Anyway, I have a bit of time on my hands.....So let's get it on.....
1st word... The. 2nd word....real. 3rd word....Mcoy... AWWW!! F*#%!
My real words for this game are..
Trouble/chess/ bear.... Hmmm let me think.....
Saturday, 12 May 2012
Okay so it is with super fucking totally rad~core over the top excitability that I wander into my email to discover this little beauty of a picture...the first promotional pic from my Canadian twinnie sista's in crime, Jen and Sylvia Soska's 2nd feature, American Mary! <3 The first pic features Katherine Isabelle in the title role of Mary, meeting two potential clients...with bad ass fucking awesome as fuck back~deco! :P I want my back to look like that! :D Also featured is Twan Holliday, looking all bad ass and biker boy...mmmmmmm. I freakin' love everything about this photo, it truly is an epic first picture! Well, next to THAT picture that Jen accidentally leaked before, mwahahaha. Now that was a bad ass picture! :D
Next picture to be released is one of Antonio Cupo in the role of Billy Barker, Jen and Sylvia's tribute to horror legend Clive Barker, a tribute I have a feeling Mr Barker will fucking love!!! <3
Now I am one of the lucky few to have read the script and I can tell you now, it's fucking beyond all quantities of fucked up awesomeness!!! And looking at these stills is making me wet with anticipation!!!
Now these pics aren't the only exciting things happening in the world of Mary...Jen and Sylvia are actually headed to the Cannes Film Festival for the World Market Premier of American Mary on the 17th May! I am so excited and proud of my sisters, they have accomplished so much, and in such a short period of time. I can't wait to be able to share more pics...and I'm especially looking forward to seeing Tristan Risk as Beatress Johnson. Sooooooo looking forward to her! :D I mean, just check her out with Jen and Sylv! ;)
In the meantime, please check out my blog on the full cast of the movie where you can view the teaser trailer as well. And also, in celebration of Jen and Sylvia talking Mary to Cannes...take some enjoyment out of these pics... ;)